When was the last time you sat down and were quietly bored on purpose?
No devices. No phones. No screens. No music. For some of you (I’m thinking young parents), it may seem like an impossibility moment. For others, the thought of a noise “fast” produces anxiety.
In fact, psychologists tell us that being quiet and reflective is especially a problem for young adults. They have literally been weaned on screens. Reflective thinking is a scary exercise for them. They’re more prone to “phone a friend” (and I don’t mean calling them but messaging/texting) than they are to consider the benefit of being bored and alone. Others model the drivenness of our western culture because they feel guilty when they relax.1
“Keeping busy can stem from the desire to be seen by others as competent, capable and even perfect—and slowing down may spark feelings of inadequacy and shame… Slowing down may spark other unpleasant emotions, such as boredom, loneliness and guilt… Ramping up our activities and tasks is simply another way to avoid sitting with those uncomfortable feelings... Your inability to slow down may have deeper roots.”2
I recently had the privilege of sitting down with (well, Zooming) Lisa Granger for a podcast about “how to slow down Christmas.”3 I was able to speak with some authority because I’ve been grittily attempting to slow the passing of time from December 1 to December 25 for several years now. I wrote a post about it back in 2016:
And I just chuckled because here’s my view now:
Eight years later, and I’m looking at the same scene. Not much has changed, but then again so much has. The benefit of sitting and thinking is that you notice what you may not have when noise and dings and screens keep whittling away at your attention span.4 Prolonged, intentional, quiet boredom is a desperate need of your heart, soul and mind.
Then direct your boredom to wonder. Let your ennui settle into contemplation. Think high thoughts. Ponder. Lift your eyes, attention and affections to beyond the banal to eternal things. Think of God’s love expressed fully toward you in Jesus through Christmas.
So I’m here to encourage you again to slow down this Christmas. Slow yourself down, and join me in attempting to “slow down Christmas.”
As I simply look around (since I’m writing, I am admittedly looking at a screen, with one of my favorite Christmas albums5 playing in the background), I “happen to” notice that there are more stockings hanging on our mantle than ever before. There were four in the picture in 2016. Now there are seven.
Both of our kids got married, and now we have a Shepherd (my grandson’s name) of our own to tell the Christmas story to this year.6 It’s amazing what you notice if you’ll just… be “bored.”
My simple counsel? Embrace “boredom” at Christmas. Perhaps it can even become a lifestyle. Don’t be so quick to pick up your phone or distract yourself with noise or task. Just… be. Look. Think. Get even more radical and be grateful. From such mundane moments, epiphanies happen.
Merry Christmas!
For years, I kept a book on my bookshelf in my office simply for the message of the title: When I Relax, I Feel Guilty. I’ve never read it, but I’ve lived it. (By Tim Hansel, Chariot Family Pub: 1979)
Why You Can’t Slow Down, by Margarita Tartakovsky, PsychCentral: January 2, 2019)
You can listen to it on Spotify here or on Apple Podcasts here.
Interestingly, attention span studies reveal that popular tropes about decreasing attention span are mostly based on anecdotal rather than scientific evidences.
“Almost a decade ago, a Time magazine article went viral when the author proclaimed that humans now have a shorter attention span than a goldfish - just eight seconds, on average. While this is wildly untrue (their claim was based on a small sample of web users and it is currently impossible to measure the attention span of a goldfish), observations of our own experiences (popcorn brain, anyone?), increasing ADHD diagnosis rates, and teachers sounding the alarm around students’ inability to focus may lead us to believe that our attention spans are at risk in the digital information age. But what does the science actually say?…
There is some evidence to suggest attention spans, on average, have been decreasing, but this may say more about our evolving environments than our actual capacity to sustain attention.”
From Are Attention Spans Actually Decreasing? by Sarah D’Aurizio (The Center for Brain, Mind and Society at Columbia University)
See also Busting the attention span myth (BBC: March 10, 2017)
They say that the average attention span is down from 12 seconds in the year 2000 to eight seconds now. That is less than the nine-second attention span of your average goldfish.
You might have seen those stats in Time magazine, external, the Telegraph, external, the Guardian, external, USA Today, external, the New York Times, external or the National Post, external. Maybe you heard a Harvard academic citing them on US radio, external. Or perhaps you read the management book Brief, external.
But if you pay a bit more attention to where the statistics come from, the picture is much less clear.
You have to listen to Sidewalk Prophets Christmas album if you haven’t before. It’s wonderful!
Our grandson John Shepherd Noble was born October 30, 2023, and at a little over one, he’s at the perfect age to experience the beauty and wonder of Christmas this year. 🥺
One thing I noticed in your pictures is that 8 years ago your t..v. was on, and then is wasnt.. also had to look up what ennui means,,, haaaaa!! But seriously great article,, Ive been working on slowing down and contemplating more each Christmas as well,, to truly meditate on Christ during Advent, to make it a season of quiet reflection on the glory of our Lord and Savior coming down to save His people from their sins. We all need to slow down and shut off all media and screens and reflect on Christ. with the Word of God in front of us,, I say this to myself mostly.. with grandchildren now, they dont need more gifts, or cookies, , they need me to speak Christ into their hearts and minds.